diff --git a/dotfiles/gitconfig b/dotfiles/gitconfig
index fbd98fa0..d8d752c3 100644
--- a/dotfiles/gitconfig
+++ b/dotfiles/gitconfig
@@ -66,9 +66,9 @@
 	new = green bold
 
 [color "status"]
-	added = yellow
-	changed = green
-	untracked = cyan
+	added = green
+	changed = yellow
+	untracked = red
 
 [url "git@gist.github.com:"]
 	insteadOf = "gst:"
diff --git a/dotfiles/lib/shellrc/functions.sh b/dotfiles/lib/shellrc/functions.sh
index 0fa727d6..0213bde8 100644
--- a/dotfiles/lib/shellrc/functions.sh
+++ b/dotfiles/lib/shellrc/functions.sh
@@ -237,3 +237,31 @@ function brew_for_multiple_users() {
     sudo chgrp -R admin /Library/Caches/Homebrew
     sudo chmod -R g+w /Library/Caches/Homebrew
 }
+
+function swap_audio() {
+    test -z $(SwitchAudioSource -c | grep HDMI) && SwitchAudioSource -s HDMI || SwitchAudioSource -s "Built-in Output"
+}
+
+function talk_dirty_to_me() {
+    python - <<EOF
+from random import randrange
+import re
+import urllib
+
+def talk_dirty_to_me():
+    socket = urllib.urlopen("http://www.youporn.com/random/video/")
+    htmlSource = socket.read()
+    socket.close()
+    result = re.findall('<p class="message">((?:.|\\n)*?)</p>', htmlSource)
+    if len(result):
+        print result[randrange(len(result))]
+    else:
+        talk_dirty_to_me()
+
+talk_dirty_to_me()
+EOF
+}
+
+function dirty_talk() {
+    while true; do talk_dirty_to_me | tee >(cat) | say; done
+}